Indonesia – why I had to leave.


I’m all about intuition and gut feeling so when all the signs were pointing for me to leave Bali, I got the hell out of there. It didn’t help that I was on the verge of zero dollars.

So there I was…all packed, and ready for the next chapter in Jakarta. I was excited.
Excited to be in the presence of family, and familiarity.
Excited to have three meals a day again, and get my own room.
Excited to do nothing, and watch movies.
Excited to get my shit together.
Excited to look for jobs, and what not.

However, the longer I stayed there, the more I realised something. This was the first time in a long time where I’ve had to step out of my dream like haze, and really assess my situation.

I was torn. I didn’t know what I wanted anymore. I kept going back and forth from the idea of going home, to staying. Go? Stay? Go? Stay? Seeing my family, and hearing about home made me miss it that much more.

Then came a job offer… Bali. It seemed too good to be true.

Here I was, ready to accept Bali, and fate intervened and gave me two options.
1) Take the job in Bali
2) Reject Bali offer, and move back home

Head VS heart? I had to go with my gut and my heart. The thought of relocating to Bali just didn’t sit well with me anymore. It didn’t feel right. It was what I wanted before was it not?

What’s the point in staying somewhere where there are no longer reasons for you to be there. If you’re settling into a city, or a country you want to be building something, creating something. When it no longer serves you purpose, or you become too complacent, why stay?
This goes for everything in life. Your job, where you live, the environment we are in, and especially the relationships people are in.

Too many people are in unhappy situations, and do nothing about it. Too many people get too comfortable, or too stuck in their confinements, and familiarity that we never end up leaving. Days, turn into months, and months turns into years, and before you know it you’re still there. Stuck.

I didn’t have anymore reasons to stay in Jakarta….so finally I made the decision it was time for me to come home. Now I can look back, and thank my gut for bringing me home because it has been one life changing decision.

Now don’t get me wrong Indonesia remains to be one of my hometowns having lived there for 8 years but my god I am glad I don’t live there anymore.
Jakarta is an amazing city in different ways, but it just wasn’t for me.
I didn’t like the never-ending traffic, and chaotic mess. Or the fact that the only way to escape, is to go to lavish malls and spend hours sitting in one restaurant, watching girls dressed in their best outfits, and heels. IN A SHOPPING MALL.

It just wasn’t me.

If whatever situation you’re in no longer serves you purpose, gives you reason, and brings you happiness my advice is to just go. Find a new path, and keep moving forward.


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